I don’t want to yell at my daughter
Here’s how I’m changing.
Last week, I shared how mindfulness has helped me stop snapping at the people I care about most when I’m overwhelmed.
I ended the blog post by asking you:
How different would life be if you responded to every moment calmly and intentionally?
For me, the biggest change would be not yelling at my daughter.
I hate yelling. It feels awful afterward. But sometimes, things just get too much 🤷♀️
Like when both kids are crying, and I can’t comfort them both, and my older one tries to climb the stair gate for attention—and I snap.
In that moment, there’s no thought process. I’d love to say, “Oh, I was just keeping her safe,” but the truth is, I lost it.
Keeping her safe would have meant staying calm, putting down the younger toddler, and stopping her from climbing.
But hindsight is a wonderful thing.
How Mindfulness Helps Me
Old Me would have spiraled into guilt, called myself an awful mum, blah blah blah.
Mindful Me moves on, gets calm, and later reflects on what I could do differently next time.
Here’s the thing: because I reflect kindly—without beating myself up—I stay motivated to improve.
Think about it.
If a teacher praised your progress while encouraging you to keep learning, you’d feel inspired to try harder, right?
But if that teacher constantly told you you’re terrible for not being better already, you’d probably want to give up.
Finding Motivation to Be Mindful
Mindfulness can be hard.
Sometimes I don’t want to focus on the present moment, especially during repetitive tasks like reading “The Easter Surprise” for the fifth time this morning (yes, I know it’s January).
But when challenges sneak up, I’m reminded why mindfulness matters—and that motivation keeps me going.
That’s why motivation is a key part of my MINDFUL™ process.
It’s not just about training your brain to be present. It’s a 7-step system that helps you reflect on what’s working, why it matters, and what to adjust—without feeling bad about yourself.
Two Ways to Start Right Now
If you want to be more mindful but find it hard, here are two tips to get started:
Reflect honestly on how life would look if you were more mindful. Go beyond “I’d be calmer.” Picture specific scenarios and how you’d handle them differently.
Celebrate how far you’ve come. I don’t feel bad about snapping at the stair gate moment because Old Me would’ve reacted like that every time. Instead, I’m proud that these moments are getting fewer.
Want support?
If you’re ready for a framework to make mindfulness stick, that’s what we’re covering in MOMENTUM.
Over the next three months, I’ll walk you through my MINDFUL™ process—a 7-step system you can complete in just 10 minutes a week (or a month).
It’s designed to make mindfulness easier and help you keep going, even when life feels overwhelming.
Or if you're a person who learns by doing, there's join us at mindful living retreat 7-9th Feb 2025 near Bristol, UK.
You'll PRACTICE being mindful and learning the MINDFUL™ process to make it part of life when you get home.
Sending love,
Lucy x